My inner peace is buffering. Please hold.

Confidence level: I just sent a risky text… to myself.

Adulting is just googling how to fix everything.

I’m not tired, I’m just running on dreams and Wi-Fi.

My talent? Making awkward situations more awkward.

Emotionally mature? Bro, I still Google if I'm dying when I sneeze twice.

I spend more time looking for remote than watching TV.

I emotionally attach to broken chargers.

I ghost people like I ghost responsibilities.

My soul is permanently “Out of Office.”

I forget names but remember snack brands.

I celebrate every tiny achievement with dramatic laziness.

I laugh at memes meant to fix my life.

I Google things I should’ve learned in 5th grade.

I don’t make mistakes. I make creative choices.

My resting face scares people more than my actual rage.

If overthinking burned calories, I’d be invisible.

My playlist: 60% sad, 40% aggressive, 0% stable.

If red flags were a font, she types in bold.

She came, she saw, she left everyone drained.