I skip gym but chase the delivery guy.

I socialize once a year, like taxes.

I pretend I’m okay, then order fries.

I have a PhD in making things awkward.

I don’t jog, I emotionally sprint.

I use humor as a personality patch.

I fake enthusiasm like a pro.

I schedule life around laziness.

I delete messages so fast you'd think I robbed a bank.

I listen to sad songs like I’m the main character.

I build dreams with snack bricks.

I reply “lol” while dying inside.

I whisper “same” to sad memes.

I run on dreams and delusion.

I talk to my coffee before humans.

I believe in ghosts and bad decisions.

Introvert in the streets, overthinker in the sheets.

When nothing goes right, go to sleep.

Yes, I’m smiling. No, that doesn’t mean I’m listening.

Diet update: I just had cake for breakfast.