“Do not disturb” is both a phone setting and a lifestyle.

When someone says “long story short” but it’s still a trilogy.

My entire personality is built on caffeine and confusion.

Weekends are just speed bumps between Mondays.

I whisper “what the heck” to myself at least 15 times a day.

Sorry I’m late, I didn't want to come.

Reality called—I hit decline.

Mood: Waiting for success like it’s a delayed train.

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Tuesday.

Why talk about feelings when we can talk about food?

I was born to be wild… but only indoors and with snacks.

Sleeping is my cardio and dreams are my vacation.

I chase dreams, but they have better cardio.

I stress so hard I forget the reason.

I ghost group chats with zero guilt.

I dodge responsibilities like I dodge ads.

I survive chaos with snacks and audacity.

I argue with myself and still lose.

I reply mentally 10 times before texting.

I treat sleep like it’s optional DLC.