All wrong

trying to act normal

'I’ll just have one drink'

Hey Mom

When you try to flirt and it comes out like a threat:

Welcome to the Overthinkers’ Museum

And tell you to smile

'Why did I do this to myself?

When your phone's auto-correct is way too confident in making mistakes for you

awkward moment

awkward moment

When you know you should go to bed

Spending 10 minutes trying to find a parking spot...

you finally get the joke

Me: Buys healthy food

I am pissed

Every time

alarm goes off

wrong language setting.

looking at couch